it ain't over it ain't over;

“When I get lonely these days, I think: So BE lonely. Learn your way around loneliness. Make a map of it. Sit with it, for once in your life. Welcome to the human experience. Know and Understand that one should never again use another person’s body or emotions as a scratching post for your own unfulfilled yearnings.”

1. :)
2. This dweeb is so funny and I don't even know what show he's from
3. Today, I stalked somebody for at least an hour.... a solid hour. Must've been mad but I got really tired and stoned but nothing juicy got out of it hahahahahahahahaha it was mad funny.. and fun ;) totally wanna do it again
4. I haven't had time to sit down and go through my pictures and all so erm, just wait for it kids.. even though I get nagged at so much
5. My mind's doing a switching on and off thing, I think I better sleep
6. I should sleep before 2am. HIMYM taught me that nothing good ever happens after 2am. True y/n?
7. I want to go into cute little shops and quiet places, stand there and imagine all the lovely photos I could take with a film camera
8. Next year, I'm really looking forward to 2011. Doesn't look pretty but a new year, a new soul
9. I'm hot and cold hot and cold hot and cold
10. Doesn't the gif wanna make you yawn like crazy? I did the whole time I was typing this whole chunk hee hee






2011, come on over here!
x L

promise not to promise anymore;

The opposite of love is not hate, it’s indifference. The opposite of art is not ugliness, it’s indifference. The opposite of faith is not heresy, it’s indifference. And the opposite of life is not death, it’s indifference.

Elie Wiesel 

‎Keep away from people who try to belittle your ambitions. Small people always do that, but the really great make you feel that you, too, can become great.

Mark Twain

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1. dancing in the bathroom to "Fuck you" by cee lo green, mtv's pretty cute

2. taking an unintentional nap after days and days of torture of resisting naps

3. feeling the warmth of your puppy next to your butt

4. feeling like you're working towards something... just something :)

5. wanting to go somewhere where nobody knows your name, wishing you weren't bound by anything anyone 

6. why do people seem to make it a job to take somebody down? now my dearest friend is somewhere wishing she weren't under the same sky, wishing she could disintegrate and be part of the stars. where did she go wrong? is it a fault to love too much? is it anyone's fault to care too much? if you're reading this, i just want to lie in bed with you all day and not say a thing. we'll just breathe because we'll just exist. we'll do nothing for now, and we'll fight. sometimes not because we want to, but because we can. and i'll do anything over and over with you again if it'd at least give comfort & familiarity..... 

hungry,

x L

can you search your heart;

no one's gonna love you;

Gives You Hell - Glee

x

So tonight, I am somehow forced to sit down and think of a situation between my dear friend and I. There were countless times that I shrugged off the need to think and find a solution.. or perhaps just a catalyst to get to somewhere, somewhere that could possibly bring us to an agreement. Guess the best way to describe it is : Sweeping it under the rug. Time after time.

I would very much like to pen a letter or an email, but I know my words would be vicious. They don't attack with sudden swift movements; rather, they creep under your skin and flows through your veins, it pricks at will, shock you to a standstill, your heart beats fast and then it starts eating you.

I am told that if I were to pen a letter, give it 3 days before sending it to the intended party. So, yes I will. I will give it a week if it'd give us a week of temporary contentment. 

x

I just needed to get that off my chest. You know that feeling of feeling so much in a moment and wanting to explode, just like a can of cola that has been shaken persistently? I found myself standing much longer in the shower, talking to the wall, saying all these words that have never crossed my mind to my friend. The words found themselves so perfectly; as if they were jigsaw pieces just waiting for the hand to give them a perfect fit. That said, the bathroom is one of the most inspiring places to be. Sounds... kinky but a lot of the amazing things I've thought and said had originated from standing in the shower or passing poop. hee hee, too much information right there but hey, human waste is a natural thing. Embrace it.

I am sliding back to my lazy ass persona and I just wish to lie in bed all day, or fuss about with the smaller details in my life rather than try to save the world or spread the cheer. I have a million seconds but I'd rather devote them to planning my future than salvaging the troubles people come with. I think it's time for me to be selfish and to think of myself and what I want, than try to decipher people's ever-changing minds and ficklemindedness about who and what they want to be in my life. I think I should include a Haha here to make it sound more chillax... okay it did not work.

But, *small smile*, I'm doing well thank you very much. I just don't need unnecessary negativity in my life and my mental blocking device is back at work! Hell yeah! You bitches can suck it hahahahaha. I kid I kid. But like Barney Stinson says, "When I feel sad, I stop feeling sad and feel awesome instead. True story."hee hee. I just want to worry about my day-to-day, worry if Sasha is feeling too cold or too warm, worry if my dad is getting his daily dosage of laughter and music, worry if my mother is getting a little too busy and stressed out, worry if I should be feeling woozy every night sitting in this chair.

I'd like to live in the moment and dream out aloud and eat candy and down it with cola and then go on dreaming about the near future and talk to people and dish fashion advice and think about cute guys and devise ways to sort the things swimming in my head etc etc. A pretty rad and simple plan for now, but like how The Weepies roll : I want to live a simple life..

.. For now,

x L ;)

Death and all its friends;

Oh my god. I have just finished Grey's Anatomy Season 6 AND BLOODY HELL. I WENT THROUGH SO MUCH EMOTIONALLY OH GOD. I want to tell everybody I love them and okay, I know I tend to go a little crazy telling people I love them. (I have these urges when I feel as if I'm about to die or dying a little.. eg. food poisoning) To help me illustrate what I've mostly faced the past two hours....

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Need to wake up early for retail therapy with my momma. Oh god, Grey's anatomy ftw.








x L

blahblahblah;

In the light of some recent event(which is, rather laughable)....

(i'm not stooping to your level of calling people bitches~ hahaha but it's a gif and gifs are awesome! sharing some love)


This post is dedicated to sharing my thoughts and my take on what certain people has been blabbering/spreading to others and defaming my dear friend and yours truly in the process.. Nice... What's your point again?

Okay, how about let's start by talking about the ambiguity of the words that perhaps triggered the fury of certain people? A private joke was shared between my good friend, Angel, and yes, it wasn't in a "private place" but nonetheless, it definitely wouldn't be seen unless certain settings were tweaked and the approval of the allowance of wandering eyes were done, it was really no one's business to make it their business. Until of course, it started getting personal.

The thing about ambiguity? It doesn't point fingers at directly at you, doesn't name names, and it very subtly could point at anything (which of course, the offended parties do not understand, which I can forgive..). An example: "I am angry at what you said and what you did." Your inference: You are angry at somebody which could possibly be me, cos I might have accidentally blurted something out which I didn't know could've offended you.. or it could be someone else?

(So you see kids, the lesson is, you don't know who it was about and who it was directed to, UNLESS STATED. Unless you're the said guilty party, you don't want to publicly take up this position and then start ranting to people and then start making things ugly. Read your fine print more okay, you guys might get cheated because there are a lot of grey areas here and there in black and white.. but more on it later)

So naturally, the ones guilty of the funny usage of English stepped out and decided to be angry, which is all fine and dandy until it started getting personal, lame and bordering on pathetic when the broadcasting of their personal lives began (oh, as if getting people on your side would help you.. but it does, it makes you feel better doesn't it? Go ahead man. Really, go take sides and make yourself happy and that your friends love you yada yada.. yay for your popularity *claps*).

My point of it all is: The atrocity of the sentences and words used were all out in the public, and it kinda invites ridicule? :\ Just like how you see funny signs at restaurants going, "This Chye Por Egg never lied. The young and old loves." HAHAHAHAHHA, I mean isn't it hilarious? It's innocent, but you still laugh at it anyway and it becomes your private joke. And moreover, these sort of ridicule are ALL OVER THE NET.. But anyway, guilty ones just proved my point. Which was what I was laughing at in the first place. Not at the person, but the funny words used by said person(which is lame of me to do that thinking back hmmm).

So anyway, of course they took it personally! Apparently from what I inferred, laughing at how someone phrases things is actually laughing AT the person. Should comedians be out of job? Should singers and songwriters be out of jobs because the person they could be telling to 'shut the hell up and live your life' could be YOU (and you feel so offended you start to hate on the artist? LOL quite funny when you think about it..)? Should my friends feel furiously offended if they had the slip of the tongue and pronounced lunch as runch or carbonara as carborana, and I burst out laughing? *shrugs* 

It's all in good fun people.. until you made it ugly and I didn't actually want to bore myself with your nonsense. Nothing against that girl, but that dude sure is annoying.

I could turn a blind eye to you being offended, I could turn a blind eye to you being a big mouth by ranting it to your friends publicly (which isn't very mature), by wanting to stand up for  your girlfriend (which is in good spirit), by wanting to ruin reputations and defaming us cos you clearly didn't understand the point of what we were laughing at (oh, that is IF we were laughing at what you think we were in the first place)..

But I could not turn a blind eye when you started using vulgarities on my friend, who happened to be your ex girlfriend, who happened to be the victim of your incessant bullying in the relationship (because you were the one who kept walking away, the one who was fickle minded and couldn't choose, the  one who chucked the old to get the new when obviously things were not clearly and cleanly broken off with the old etc.), and claiming that my friend "has no life, has not moved on and is jealous".. oh, and her life is "just a tragic"?

Well, well. Look who hasn't moved on. Ask yourself, have you moved on? Have you REALLY moved on? Reflect on things you've done in dishonesty, reflect on yourself really. Then think about things you've said to her. Here you are acting all macho and slamming my friend, and then when you're all sad, what do you do and who do you turn to? Screw you and your two-face act. Don't be such a two headed snake. And if you want to be one, get out of her life and pull your pathetic stunt on someone else. My friend doesn't deserve an ex-boyfriend like you who wasn't a good 'boyfriend' in the past, and here she is, being nice to her ex-bf when it isn't obligatory and this is what she gets. and you know what they say.. about the "crazy ex bf thing" Now, that's "a tragic".. ha..

I am in no position to comment on anything, or want to be part of this thing between you guys, but I won't let my friend get defamed and be called a bitch or allow people to say "fuck you" and "left you for good" WHICH BY THE WAY, have you left for good? lol I am in no position also to say who's right or wrong, or judge anyone because I have only heard of the situation from different people and from the people who were directly involved, but if you dare to lay a finger physically or virtually on my friend, you better be smarter than this. A lot smarter than this.

I don't care if your friends who aren't part of this, hates me, or hates me for standing up for my friend, or hates us for being bitches for laughing at funny things you said, I really don't care. Cos I'm not the one going around telling people, "omg you know who who who said what what what, what a bitch!" and then so? Then what are you gonna get out of it? More fans of anti-us? It'll make you guys more united and bonded? What do you want out of spreading all these? You want people to say, "They're gonna get karma, nevermind they're gonna get karma". So we'll get karma for laughing at the kinds of funny words you said? Yeah, I think I got my funny english karma already because I typed a couple of stuff wrongly  publicly hahahahaah which you are allowed and welcomed to laugh at.

My point is, what's the point of you spreading all these to others and ranting to them and talking shit about us? Why not just come to us and just tell us it wasn't very nice what you think we did, and maybe this wouldn't be making a mountain out of a molehill? Why write those ugly stuff on your wall like, "fuck you, didnt except you to do that.. so much for being a 'good' gf.. etc.?" and you guys think every status or comment is about you? You think my comment of "hahah the singing sucks" applies to you? How would you know? Don't people post up videos of them singing all the time? :\  and then quoting my friend who said, "best duet of all time" and then the dude goes to say nasty things about the ex-gf? Being so sensitive and over-reading into things.. wow, you guys win. You guys can really take offense at everything single comment and then getting people to back you up.
 

If you were braver and classier, you could've just come straight to us or me, and ask about it like if it was really making fun of you, and things would be solved in a politically correct manner. Instead of the ugly mess you've created, you could've been in a drama-free situation and where I could be nice to people instead of looking like a bitch when I'm just standing up for a friend and helping her clear up the claims you made. Well, whatever it is, it's open for discussion between us. If you're gonna make it uglier, then that's your problem. I'm done with this for now and don't want to be embroiled in your nonsense~ 

On a nicer note, be happy you have each other. At least make whatever mess you caused be worth it :)

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See? I can be nice when I'm asked to be nice. And other than this lame thing, life's all good. I just needed a place to rant because unlike other people, I don't stink up facebook with my nonsense and hope people 'like' what I say when defaming other people... It just reflects on your maturity and the way you deal with things. So, deal. with. it. And wish for peace :)

x L

EVERYBODY SHOULD LOVE REGINA SPEKTOR

I love Regina Spektor.. An idiosyncratic talent, don't you think?

Her music just extracts happy feelings unconventionally

mm mm mm *bobs head up and down*

She Never Wakes Up

 

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We just had a chalet to celebrate the end of FYP and well, it was pretty awesome with the spamming of alcohol.. especially me even at 6am in the morning but okay, I was pretty occupied taking care of loonies like Izak Teh who kept wanting to walk "straight in a line" while we went out to get more mixers to continue our drinking session but er, they mostly fell asleep leaving us 3 girls which was really lame haha. 

Dear PX, I do hope your hangover's gone!! I know how effed up one can feel with the constant spamming lololol, get more water into your system. That's the only cure I'll ever know... unless anyone wants to share? Don't give me the "alcohol solves alcohol" solution k, don't think it works ha!

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Anyway, just to rant..

I WAS ONE OF THE CHOSEN HALF OF THE COHORT TO GO FOR THE DAMN EXTERNAL EXAMINATION THING...

.. which if you do not understand, it means we'd have to present to a lecturer from some foreign university, hotshot from Asylum(?!ASYLUM I THINK IM DEAD), and a lecturer from another course in our school. Somebody slap me.

I shouldn't have prayed to not get chosen because it always turns out the other way.(okay why am i feeling so itchy pfft ithcgijsgjlsg scratchy) But anyway, GAH. Okay I should take it as an opportunity to errr brush up my presentation skills, awkwardness meeting strangers, NETWORKING (...) and oh yah, most importantly - my damn booth. 

I honestly hate it. Having to do all this. I really just want to get over this FYP thing. Now it seems like my school life isn't over until the Diploma Show ugggggggh. Okay, I shouldn't be talking like this but honestly, it's never ever gonna be over till it's really over huh. 

And not to mention, we have to worry about our works for our portfolio, panels, namecards etc............ -.- its a whole big ZZZ again and I wonder if I'll have enough time to do things I want..?

Okay stop it. I will. yes. Okay.

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This is so draggy but I BORROWED BOOKS FROM THE LIBRARY. Yay right? Like *throws confetti* and.. Oh wait, I love Gifs. ONTD motherhell rocks because of the hilarious gifs overload.

This reminds me - Need to sort bookmarks digitally. And re-organise my files and shit.

Good. And Pack My Room and Get a Bicycle Chain Lock so that my sister will not take my stuff any longer ha ha ha ha ha!

I wished I could post more gifs but I have to go for a temple thing(yes I am a buddhist) and I wanted to talk about the books I borrowed(The Secret Life of Bees, Haruki Murakami etc.) but then I realised I have nothing to talk about it except that I have finished my Sophie Kinsella "Remember Me?" book and it just makes you feel-good and whatnot, and I kind of want to go back to indulging in brainless chick lit!! HELP.

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Anyway, I REALLY LIKED SITTING AROUND SINGING WITH MY FRIENDS ALONG TO THE PLAYING OF THE GUITAR. Very cool and amazing cos my friends are awesome at singing and harmonizing.. Woooo.

Need to get a guitar now?