goodbye my santa monica dream;

I'm feeling... lost.

The kind of lost where you don't know what you want. Or what you have been doing.

I hate looking at empty rooms. Empty seats. Not seeing the faces you want to. Not feeling the things you looked forward to. Not having what you thought you easily could... 

Just sharing my feelings. I finally do feel something. And it looks for you before you sleep, or when you get back home late in the night wondering why you did the things you do and not the things you wanted to.

Maybe I need to do some soul searching.

the world repeats itself;

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One of the rare moments when I start to feel a little sad, a little angry, a little bitter... and then I think, I just miss what I had. Just.. missing it. I shouldn't be sorry to miss it should I? But then I tell myself, I can't go back, I can't go back embracing the darkness. I can't climb back in to the dark hole and lay there, and wait for my broken bones to mend. 

And that's what I'm really afraid of. Going back to that. So... am I comfortable with where I am right now?

x L